Friendship

For the past weeks,
I've been thanking God for those best friends I kept and will continue to keep.

I don't have to mention names becoz they already know who they are.

I just deleted a whole bunch of paragraphs before deciding on posting this one.

I was angry and pissed and wrote a bunch of details which I'm sure no one wants to read.

So, instead,

lets attached a couple of quotes about friendship.

but in the end,

If you have to explain something so meaningful like this to someone,

you have to wonder,

is it worth my time?

If you can't figure it out yourself, others can't really help you.


. . . 

argh! let's cue Jojo - FAB song!

Question

Caution
long post.

. . .

you know that guy friend who has a girlfriend-turn-wife yang penjeles ya amat?

When Ahmad (bukan nama sebenar) begirlfriend with Sarah (bukan nama sebenar), Ahmad had been avoiding his other friends. especially yg bini2.
the other female friends was told (by the male friends of their circle of friends) that Sarah was a penjeles girlfriend.
the other female friends understand.

and then, Ahmad and Sarah got married.

So, here's a situation:

Erin posted something on social media and Ahmad liked it.
Erin got scared. Scared that Ahmad's wife Sarah would get a wrong idea.
but nothing happened (Sarah did not go and cyber attack Erin, like Erin thought Sarah would). thus, Erin ignored the like and be neutral about it.

Months had passed and Erin noticed that Ahmad liked her posts every now and then. 
Erin was no longer worrying and become curious instead.

masa becouple, you are not allowed to talk or like or heart any other girls' post on social media
but
selepas kawin, you can resume the talking, liking, hearting other girls' post?



Here's the question:

Why is that?

disclaimer: I am single AF and I'm not trying to be know it all about this kind of thing. I'm just curious.

In my understanding, if I don't want him to talk to other girls when we're dating, I certainly don't want him to talk to other girls when we're married.

Maybe it's a trust issue?
you don't trust him when he's your boyfriend
but
you trust him when he's your husband?
PLEASE UNDERSTAND: the 'He' here is the same person.

In my understanding, if I can't trust him when he's my boyfriend, why on earth did I marry him?!

Let's change POV (point of view)

Maybe he was menjaga hati the girl
Ok, he jaga my hati when he's my boyfriend
but
thought it's ok to not jaga my hati when we're married?
Isn't menjaga hati your wife more important?

I really can't do much POV on guys 


Anyway,

I'm just dead curious about this stuff.

coz from Erin's POV, she is scared that Sarah might get the wrong idea. Ahmad might thought that what he's doing is ok. but who knows what Sarah is feeling, right?

I also understand that maybe Sarah isn't getting a wrong idea coz Ahmad married her and she shouldn't be questioning his loyalty and trust him.

Another opinion of mine; Ahmad shouldn't be like that from the moment he berCouple with Sarah. He shouldn't push away his female friends in the beginning to jaga hati girlfriend but after he kawin with Sarah, resume being friends with his female friends again. it's confusing and troublesome.

but once again, I don't know why Ahmad did what he did. Maybe that's the only way he knows how to deal with it?
I just strongly believe that he could've handled it better.

because the moment Ahmad pushes his other friends (male and female) away, they also distant themselves from him. and when he tries to befriend them again, they don't want to.

can you blame them?
I understand if you push away bad influences from your life to be better
but we're friends. 
IF not the best of friends, I'm sure we're good friends of yours.
I get that you can't talk to us (female) to jaga the hati of your girlfriend but did you realize that you avoided going out with our group (have male also) too?
and now that you're married, you wanted to go back to how it was?
are you serious?

that's not how you're supposed to treat your friends.

I understand that married people have commitment but i have never met anyone, who before they were married, pushes everybody away just to keep 'the other half' happy.

that's all that I've got to say.

I could write a novel about this, believe me.

Yes, Erin is me. it's how I feel about the situation. the curiosity is mine.

Once again, I'm single and maybe I don't understand this "sacrifices".

all I can do right now is be neutral and try not to overthink. 

My positivity   It's definitely not me. it's them.

. . .

Having a Guy Friend

I used to have a couple more guy friends (other than my old classmates from high school) through out the years.

but now, noted the 'used to'? 
Yeah
I didn't type that wrong.

I distanced myself from them because they have a girlfriend and she is jealous AF.
or as some Bruneian love to say, "Penjeles Kan Mati".

I understand pulang. I understand how they feel. Aku kan perempuan jua.
But I hope these 'ladies' also understand the reason I stayed away was because aku menjaga hati durang supaya inda 'continue' kan jeles-jeles lagi. 
Not because i Have feelings for your boyfriend.
I am usually a neutral person, yg when a guy friend ada girlfriend and he brings her to our group outing, I usually treat her like she's one of us too. 
but these ladies usually maintain a cool facade and i think i'm not that dumb to not take a hint. like, awu, boyfriend mu, ambil chia~~

Now these couples are married and I think I was blocked from the guys' IGs too. 

I just feel sorry that our friendship ended that way.

But seriously guys, it's not you, it's your wife.

hahaha

take a chill pill.

Maybe it's because aku single kali. maybe I, somehow, mengeluarkan aura 'desperate' for a husband or something that makes them think that I'm after their partners.

Are you for real?

Yes, of course I wana get married too and have a husband but woman, I am not that desperate. Banyak lagi lelaki Korea for me to pick from; example, SHINee has 5 member I could choose out from. *ketawa gulik-gulik pasal pakai example lelaki Korea*

So, to my other guy friends yg girlfriends durang are my another extension of friends, you guys punya girlfriends are the awesome-st kerana memahami erti persahabatan (or dalam bahasa Inggeris nya: for understanding the meaning of friendship).

and just a little foot note: When I like a guy (like a crush or something), I can hardly utter a single word in front of him. So, if you see/hear me chatting away lively and/or enthusiastically, that is not it.

to those who think that this post is somewhat insensitive and thought "She's single. She doesn't know what she's talking about. Wait till she's in their shoes" well, maybe you are right. but why don't you give it a thought or two; how do you live with such insecurities? how do you live without trust? If that was the case, shouldn't you be single?

. . .

See this hunk?

Yeah, it's him I want.

You and your protective ass can chill.

. . .

Sorry, Not Really

as I was buying a new pen (PENS) last weekend, 
I realized that I'm truly a sucker for stationery;
Pens, cute erasers, pencils (although I seldom use pencils now that I'm older), pencil cases, ruler (yes, like, I don't know when I'm gonna be using these lovely pieces of measurements), colored markers (sharpies ones are too expensive, so I often buy the kiddies one in 12s ≧◡≦ ), paper clips (YES.PAPER.CLIPS) and journals. Of course, its not limited to the above mentioned items. It could be so much more.

here are SOME OF my collections;

yes, stashed away in the coolest pen holder EVER ヾ( ~▽~)ﾂ ♪

and these are the new pen and pencil I bought;

the SHINee/Barbie colored pencil.

and this 'partial' DIY triple-colored pen.

you get to choose what color you want for your pen! 
it's that awesome! ♥╣[-_-]╠♥

I chose Pink, Purple, and dark Blue.

here's a video of me putting it (sloppily) together.

I could stop myself from buying SHINee merchandise (coz lets face it, those merchandises sometime cost more than I could afford LOL!) 
but I have the weakest of will to stop when it comes to stationery. like, I really can't stop.

Other girls would be suckers for shoes, clothes, or bags. 
*shrug* 
I guess, thats just me.

"Pen is mightier than the sword," President Sawyer, White House Down.

. . .

another very good friend of mine just got married last Friday. 
I couldn't make it to her Nikah (on Friday) and Bersanding (today) day.
So, I went to her Berbedak saja last night.

Pretty bride in red!

Congratulation Dr. Zai! Semoga berkekalan sehingga ke akhir hayat. Aminn Ya Rabb.

. . .

I believe congratulation is in order

Hellew~

as mentioned in my last post, one of my closest of friend got married!!

Congratulation bebeh! 
Sorry I wasn't as involve as a bestie should be. 
BUT alhamdulillah everything berjalan dengan lancar (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

here's a few pictures taken during her acara;

Malam Bebadak 

must have picture: bapa pengantin is a Shawol ＼(^-^)／

 Nikah Day. 

and aku baru realized aku nada gambar time durang bebasuh kaki ਉ_ਉ

Sanding Reception at Faliq's side.

here's a bonus picture;

time bebadak punya 'door' gifts.

I heart them! ♥‿♥

Mula2 aku kana bagi warna purple (which is still my fav color, don't get me wrong) but since aku nmpk warna SHINee atu, aku (shamelessly) minta tukar. hahaha

but the perks of being the bestie of the pengantin, udah kan balik atu, I asked for each of the color. KEKEKEKE 

No hating please.

Here's where I put my pretty ornaments (actually filled with boiled egg xD)

kekeke

>‿‿◕

Once again, Tahniah and Selamat Pengantin Baru to you, Kuching (whose real name is really Liyana hehe) and Husband, Faliq. Semoga berkekalan (as per most Bruneian often posted) "until Jannah". Aminn~~

. . .

Day 6 Challenge; Fave Quote

I actually have many but this one has the most meaning to me. Beside the fact that it was actually Brian's (once a member of the boyband, Westlife) life motto. v(=∩_∩=)ﾌ

. . .

Time

I went out for lunch with a office mate, Mel, couple of weeks ago and one conversation stuck with me and made me want to make this post.

It's about friends, making time, and keeping the friendship.

I don't remember how the conversation come to be but it was when I mentioned about me having lunch with my lovelies; Zawir, Buzz and Kuch. 

I aslo mentioned to her that we've been friends since high school.

and Mel said, 'bisai ah you guys still hang out together. Kalau aku, my friends always so busy and can not make it'. 

I literally paused for a couple of seconds. then I said to her, 'well, we were too but we find time'.

and I remember still thinking about what she just said and what my real thoughts were all through out lunch break.

I mean, you find time. these are your lovely friends and yes you are now busy with your own commitment and what not but when one of us suggested something like having lunch or brunch or whatever, you will find time. you make time. 

I'm a lazy person (yes, being fairly honest) but I would love to just make my time for these lovely people. Unless I really can't then I would just tell them that I can't.

and I was glad. Glad I have the friends that I have now and wouldn't trade them with anything in this world. I'm not just talking about Zawir, Buzz and Kuch. I meant my other (elbeit small) circle of friends; ex-colleague and ex-classmates. I may not be as close to them as I do the other three but they are still friends and I will make time.
besides, it's good to hang out out of your normal circle once in a while. you need it. it's good for the brain. 'broaden your mind! and you can see the future~!' Hermione mimicking Prof. Trelawney in Prisoner of Azkaban. (LOL!).

Point is ladies and gentlemen, it's your choice whether or not you want to keep the friendship. If you make time, you'll keep the friendship and if you don't make time, then, paham paham lah. 

I know we don't all need friends and be just glad to be with our family members. but I guess everybody have their own stories and some of us need that outside influences to get thru life.

Just, make the time.

. . .

a/n: I feel sorry for these people; who don't make time or are not given time.

. . .

13th Raya

this time, closer to my heart Hari Raya visit; at Buzz's and Zawir's.

First, Kuch and Fiance beraya to my house. No picture again.

and then I went with them to Buzz's house.

met Kaka Izzah and Lawi there.

Behind me: Lawi

Behind cBuzz: Kaka Izzah

Guy at the very back: Khairol(?), Kaka Izzah's friend.

We took lovely pictures there with Kuch's new monopod. the sakainess of that moment. LOL

after that we went to Zawir's. Not an open house but ada food macam open house. *happy tummy*

 Kenapa lah muka cFaliq cematu? -.- in real life, ia senyum lawa you know.

its just so hard to capture it in pictures.

as Kuch posted on IG, 'Reunited'.

we got 'angpau' some more kekeke Thanks Zawir

We went to Edy's afterwards but again, nada kami bergambar. too tired. I was like, in a daze sudah at Edy's. too tired. Sleepy berabis. ahaha Sorry to all if I talk nonsense half of the time that day. LOL

. . .

6th Raya

this had to be my most happening Raya. EVER. 
hahah coz, we went beraya-ing in a specific time frame. Job well done, Az and Buzz. LOL
there were 5 open houses that day. we went to all.

biasa, open House ani kan all about eating (heavy food) and  parut melatop lah lapas tu. If you lose some weight during Fasting month, just say Welcome Back to all them weights/fat!

First house; Kuch's. Met Ruzaimah, Putri, Udi and Zul there. Even Amalia! We spent longer time at Kuch's house because it was in a different district.

Left to Right: Buzz, me, Pu3, Kuch, Amalia and Zaimah.

2nd House; my sister's, (we didnt managed to take picture with the host)

my sister's friend's son, Adam. cute ay?

3rd House; Edy's

Left to Right: Zawir, Edy, baby Maleeq, Be'ah and Buzz

 

4th House; Rasyid's

far right: Rasyid

the guys in blue are Buzz's nephews. bujang2 sudah.

gosh, I am old. -.-

5th House; Hasrin's. we kelurusan datang with Rahmat and Syima. then Alif and gf caught up with us too soon after we arrived.

 standing: Hasrin and Zawir

seating: Rahmat, Aziz (he was already there when we arrived) and Alif.

 Syima in cream and Alif's gf in red.

of course, being at Hasrin's, betamu lagi dengan Rahmat, some mandatory pictures must be taken but I posted the above saja in this blog. 18++ Rated. LOL #sci2favoritecouple

we went to a 6th house but that was not an open house; just simply berHari Raya. it was at Buzz's brother's house whose sons pictured above. spent longer time here because we busy watching Gunman in Joseon, a korean drama. LOL pasal korea, bulih lah terstuck disana atu. we left right before midnight. 

So, 6 houses in one day. sungguh tiring but fun at the same time. A long time ago, we used to do this without the open houses. it has become a trend to only visit people during open houses. 
maybe I should make one too? just a simple/small one? tapi kan, aku ani sungguh lah 'rajin'. so, let's not count on me for a open house at my own. LOL

. . .

Final Week of Ramadhan

in the final week of Ramadhan, as always, was a hectic week.

but I managed to squeeze in two more Sungkai Outing with my two groups of friends; 

Geng Keras on 22nd July

and 

Group McD on 25th July

We were missing a few people in both outings. It'd be nice if everyone was there but sometimes some things are just out of your control. So, make use of what you've got tah saja. It was still a happy and fun outings for both. Thanks for the memories lovelies ^_^

Lets make happy memories for Hari Raya too next! 

. . .

Sungkai Out

Hello~ Hello!

quick share!

Last 17th, I went out Sungkai-ing with office mates

and on the 18th, with bestie, Zawir and fellow blogger, Esma.

 


We had the Sungkai out at Freshco Banquet Hall.

It was worth it! esp when you can go around eating all (I didn't but still feel worth it LOL) the food. I guess the key is to eat everything in small portion. xD I love the Creamy Chicken Spagetthi yg mcm arah Pastamania atu most. and the Sushi too. 
I thought I had pictures of the food taken skali, rupanya, I didn't take. LOL ah well..

Two down, two more to go. #SungkaiOut2014

. . .

for the first time

Hello again fellow readers!

Today's post would be about posting pictures. ahaha

Last Monday was the annual (ex)sci2 Sungkai Out gathering at Au Lait, Kiulap. and for the first time ever, I missed the gathering. 
(picture courtesy of Hanif, Edy, Rahmat and Jul)

(Clockwise) Rahmat, Hanif, Judin, Aziz, Faisal, Alif, Rasyid, Jul, Hasrin, Iqral, Nisa (Iqral's Wife), Bazilah, Tai Ting, Beah (not in the picture) and Edy (not in the picture as well).

Maleeq's first sci2 gathering

 

of course, we can not miss our sci2 fav couple! Rahmat (heart) Hasrin.

 cJul said, 'anak siapa tinggal oii'. LOL. cHanif plang~

looks like they had so much fun!

but I did join them 'lepak'-ing at Kiarong's TK afterwards. So no harm done. (no picture taken though ahaha luan siuk becerita atu kali).

Everybody is growing up and moving on with life (kawin, beranak, etc). Hopefully kami akan keep this good bond between us until bila2. Walaupun inda selalu jumpa, tapi masih ok bila bejumpa. :)

In shaa Allah.

. . .

Friends

Met an old friend last week. it felt good that we could just fall back into conversation like we never parted for a very long time.

and at some point of that coversation, she admitted that she envied the circle of friends I have. and I told her, I envied her for having a new circle of friends. to which she replied, "But they never last".

I sat there, shock with realization, for a second. I totally agree with her.

Her expression was something and made me thankful of what I have. When she wishes to be a part of our circle, I wish I grew out of mine.

Mr. Fletcher was right. "You win some, You lose some". I may have lost in the number of friends I have but the ones I have means so much more than just a number.

So, what I'm trying to say, is that, I love you guys!! *emotional* Like, SERIOUSLY!

I would love to mention names but you know who you are. :)

and thank you for always being there for me.

YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!!

. . .

Bestfriend

We (me and Zawir of course, bila jua luan sma urg lain ahaha) went out to dinner last time with our friend, Farah, from Korean class.
she brought along her bestfriend, Nurul, that night.
and they had this matching phone casing. too cute!!

Nurul (left) & Farah (right)

and then the next few days I go and buy me and Zawir a similar kinda casing too. MUAHAHAH ikut2an. :p

but I think why I was thinking so much about buying those same casing was because there were so much of a similarity between us and them; my forgetfulness is similar to Nurul's while Zawir's helpfulness is similar to Farah's. 
I hope we can continue our friendship with them. they're such nice people. You rarely have that in a new acquaintances these days.
I'm so used into having the same circle of friends that I just couldn't break out of it.
I mean, I was always so suspicious when someone wants to be friends with me; either they looked 'too' friendly (like they have some hidden agenda or somewhat) or just plan bitchy.
I don't know. Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm reading too much into everything.

Anyways,
yeah. Me and Zawir have the same casing. and I'm using mine at the moment. Zawir, you should start using yours too. 

A/N: doing this during my lunch break. I feel so excitedddd! maybe I should just bring my laptop everyday to work. ans waste all my break time on it. wawawawa

. . .

the annual thing

I know, so rajin, right?

heheh

this is old story already but I bet I'm the only one posting it on the blog.

sci2 annual Sungkai Out! last 3rd August.

Hanif, Azhar, Rahmat, Aziz, Edy, Iqral, Azwa, Bazilah, Be'ah, Irene, Tai Ting, and Me were there. (was actually quite surprise that Azwa actually came! yayy!!)

Irene left early, So here's the earlier picture we took of her

PLUS

Mr. Lim!! our Math teacher from form 4 till 5.

Iqral said, "Tani semua membesar, kanapa Sir masih maintain?" 

LOL! banar...sama masih bah Sir ah.

Hasrin was supposed to be there but he got some last minute changes with his work and he had to go offshore. poor thing..

Rasyid was there via whatapps (mcm time BBQ outing hari tu..)

Amal K and Amirah had another Sungkai Outing planned way before this one, so they couldn't make it.

Alifdo was in camp.

Amal Pinky, Zawir, Judin, Zulfadli couldn't make it.

I wonder if people actually invited John and Chrissy. ahahah

did I miss anybody else's name? Inda kali ah... (hahaha)

So, Thank You Edy and Be'ah for organizing this year's event. and for bringing along Mr. Lim too.

and also, Congratulation to Edy an Be'ah on expecting their 1st child! Be'ah is seven month pregnant now. First sci2 baby! Like really sci2 baby! (since parents nya dua sci2 kn..aahaha). all the best guys! kami doa2 kn yg baik2. Aminnn...

Next event? Hari Raya!!

. . .