Having a Guy Friend

I used to have a couple more guy friends (other than my old classmates from high school) through out the years.

but now, noted the 'used to'? 
Yeah
I didn't type that wrong.

I distanced myself from them because they have a girlfriend and she is jealous AF.
or as some Bruneian love to say, "Penjeles Kan Mati".

I understand pulang. I understand how they feel. Aku kan perempuan jua.
But I hope these 'ladies' also understand the reason I stayed away was because aku menjaga hati durang supaya inda 'continue' kan jeles-jeles lagi. 
Not because i Have feelings for your boyfriend.
I am usually a neutral person, yg when a guy friend ada girlfriend and he brings her to our group outing, I usually treat her like she's one of us too. 
but these ladies usually maintain a cool facade and i think i'm not that dumb to not take a hint. like, awu, boyfriend mu, ambil chia~~

Now these couples are married and I think I was blocked from the guys' IGs too. 

I just feel sorry that our friendship ended that way.

But seriously guys, it's not you, it's your wife.

hahaha

take a chill pill.

Maybe it's because aku single kali. maybe I, somehow, mengeluarkan aura 'desperate' for a husband or something that makes them think that I'm after their partners.

Are you for real?

Yes, of course I wana get married too and have a husband but woman, I am not that desperate. Banyak lagi lelaki Korea for me to pick from; example, SHINee has 5 member I could choose out from. *ketawa gulik-gulik pasal pakai example lelaki Korea*

So, to my other guy friends yg girlfriends durang are my another extension of friends, you guys punya girlfriends are the awesome-st kerana memahami erti persahabatan (or dalam bahasa Inggeris nya: for understanding the meaning of friendship).

and just a little foot note: When I like a guy (like a crush or something), I can hardly utter a single word in front of him. So, if you see/hear me chatting away lively and/or enthusiastically, that is not it.

to those who think that this post is somewhat insensitive and thought "She's single. She doesn't know what she's talking about. Wait till she's in their shoes" well, maybe you are right. but why don't you give it a thought or two; how do you live with such insecurities? how do you live without trust? If that was the case, shouldn't you be single?

. . .

See this hunk?

Yeah, it's him I want.

You and your protective ass can chill.

. . .

He shouldn't have

went on a movie 'outing' with a colleague last couple of weeks. Lelaki. and just us two.

at first, I thought, nyeh normal outing, mcm sama cZawir.

but as soon as we met at the agreed meeting place, boy was I wrong.

ok, maybe I am reading too much into this but there were serious 'hitting on' that night. I wont go into details but it was so creepy and embarrassing to say the least.

If he agreed that that night was just a normal 'colleague' movie outing, he shouldn't;

• Suggested to me that I should wear a shortlegged coverall with knee-high socks when I was wearing a longsleeve tshirt and bertudung. Excuse me? were you embarass about my appearance? I said I wouldn't read too much into it but it is still offensive.
• He also shouldn't have suggested how I can cover up before going out of the house and changed once outside. Because, I may not be that close with my mom but we have an unspeakable trust between us. and i have never deceived her that way.
• Let me carry the tray of food from the counter to our seats. I know. to some, maybe this is nothing. but to me, it's THAT big of a deal.
• Hide the fact that he was not officially broken off his engagement. (I know he was engaged. I heard rumors that he wasn't anymore and before the movie outing, I asked him 'tunang mu ok inda?' to which he shook his head and I didnt press on becoz I don't want to seem insensitive about the subject. You know, mana tau ia broken hearted kh, bru di putusnya tunang kh. but stupid me! I should've known better. 'Org Gila' said the same thing, didn't he? and he didn't actually broke it off, did he? JUST. STUPID.) and had me guarded the whole night. scared that I would be a victim of 'kana tampar mengajut' and called 'perampas tunang orang' or something. I was mostly embarass about this part. more embarrass than when I was carrying the tray. ARGH! MEN ARE SO STUPID!
• have treated me like I was that easy. coz, I would've kick your sorry ass, if you thought that your sap story about your relationship would make me all sorry and all over you. 
• have make me feel so stupid about myself. Coz, I am not stupid.

But most of all, I shouldn't have agreed to go out with him in the first place. 

I'm not gona again. especially when he kept on bragging about how he didn't approach the girl and it was her who approach him. and that I was offering him to watch the movie instead of the other way round. I reminded him, of course, that it was his idea, not mine. 

ARGH! what. a. duche!

thank you man, for making me feel so stupid.

this should be a reminder to all that, don't be like me. Ok? I trust people too easy despite me being guarded and all. just do what Professor Moody told us to do, "Constant Vigilant!"
 
why can't genuinely good man ever happened to me??

. . .

Engage

hahahaha. shockers.

Yesterday, I posted on my FB status something about "engagement". let me share it with you here:

Supervisor: Betunang ko?
Me: . . .
Supervisor: Sama sapa? Urg mana?
Me: . . .
Supervisor: Inda ko menyasal?
Me: 0.0

hahaha and I got like, 6 Likes and 2 Comments on this. and One text in Whatapps.

aku tu kn explain yg it was just some inside joke di office but since I didn't say anything about whether or not aku betunang, ku biar kn lah sja cematu.

heheh sorry to those yg pikir aku betunang. 

ALUM KU BETUNANG. DANGAN KAN BETUNANG PUN HALUM ADA. 

ahahaha

and come on. inda kan aku betunang inda membagitau org2 yg terdekat, kan? well, i did plan kn malas bising2 until kan kawin but that was just what i said before aku betunang. we never know whats gona happen when it actually happen, right? so chillax ebrebodeh. 

hahahaha

but really, I am so sorry. it was supposed to be a funny post. turned out lain plang. I really am sorry for that misunderstanding.

. . .