Rose-colored boi

found via Google

by Noxmoony on DeviantArt

Rose-colored boy

I hear you making all that noise

About the world you want to see

And oh, I'm so annoyed

'Cause I just killed off what was left of the optimist in me

I'm right at the end of my rope

A half-empty girl

Don't make me laugh, I'll choke

Just let me cry a little bit longer

I ain't gon' smile if I don't want to

Hey man, we all can't be like you

I wish we were all rose-colored too

I want you to stop insisting that I'm not a lost cause

'Cause I've been through a lot

Really all I've got is just to stay pissed off

Leave me here a little bit longer

I think I wanna stay in the car

I don't want anybody seeing me cry now

You say "We gotta look on the bright side"

I say "Well maybe if you wanna go blind"

You say my eyes are getting too dark now

But boy, you ain't ever seen my mind

Just let me cry a little bit longer

I ain't gon' smile if I don't want to

Hey, man, we all can't be like you

I wish we were all rose-colored too

. . .

Something Stupid

If Nicole Kidman and Robbie William said Something Stupid is by saying I Love You,

you might be in for a surprise in this story of mine.


a person said (about me), "She so stuck-up now becoz her loan just approved" as in the money I loan from the bank has been released.

This is not even a recent story. 
This was said (about me) like two three years ago. 
I only finding out now.

Of course my reaction was utter shock. Like, dumbfounded, even.

as posted on my IG,

So, I made this into a loop. Coz I found out something so stupid yesterday. Something so stupid I cant stop saying how stupid it is. 🤣 #icant

A post shared by Ajeerah Awang 🇧🇳 (@zeevengeance) on Jun 28, 2018 at 12:59pm PDT

One question, how does your mind works??

Duit dari loan atu is nothing for me to be proud of. I am currently still paying back the bank for it. Who on their right mind be proud of having a loan? (what's hutang in English?) (Google translate please) (Hutang = Debt) WHO IS HAPPY HAVING DEBTS?!

MY GOODNESS!

Point of the story:

1. she be trippin
2. No, it's not about my loan that I treated you badly
3. I just don't like you


HAHAHAHA

here's a quote I once shared on IG

Some people still need some growing up to do. sigh.

. . .

Friendship

For the past weeks,
I've been thanking God for those best friends I kept and will continue to keep.

I don't have to mention names becoz they already know who they are.

I just deleted a whole bunch of paragraphs before deciding on posting this one.

I was angry and pissed and wrote a bunch of details which I'm sure no one wants to read.

So, instead,

lets attached a couple of quotes about friendship.

but in the end,

If you have to explain something so meaningful like this to someone,

you have to wonder,

is it worth my time?

If you can't figure it out yourself, others can't really help you.


. . . 

argh! let's cue Jojo - FAB song!

I see you in My Dream

I've been dreaming of Travelling Solo for almost 3 years now.

The feeling is stronger now, during this Travel Fair promotion period.

I've mentioned going solo to Japan last time and I still wanted to go solo there again sometime this year and next year but I agreed to go with my sister instead.

but that remained a plan.

I might still go alone.

When I said I want to travel alone, I don't mean the adventure, climbing mountant, go diving in the ocean, jungle tracking kinda solo travel (coz that's what I found when I Google image for solo traveler)
When I said I want to travel solo, I just meant going to cities that I've been to before (eg Kuala Lumpur, Singapore, and Osaka/Tokyo).

My only reason why I want to travel solo is because I want to go at my own pace to where ever I wana go.

Just like how I am here in Brunei;
If I asked friends to go out and they wanted to come along, great.
If I asked friends to go out and they didn't want to or couldn't come along, no problem. I'll still go on my own.

maybe I'm just impatient. (▰˘◡˘▰)

because when decided I wanted to go belayar somewhere and people couldn't make it on the dates that I suggested and they suggest me go on their suggested dates, I become impatient.
I mean, this is my plan, shouldn't you be adjusting your schedule around my plan if you decided to join me?

I know that sounded mean but it's the truth.

I made myself sound selfish too but with the current mental state that I am in, I really don't care.

. . .


Edit: 8th Apr 2017.

I drafted this like end of March but I was not in a good mood composing it thus I decided not to post it out of anger.
Today, I'm in this mental state where I no longer gonna fret about smallest of details in my problems and just go with it.
I am in calm state in midst of the storm.
I don't know how else to explain how my mind works these past few weeks.
Not that I ever know how 

┐(‘～`；)┌

I'm going crazy.

. . .