My makeup evolution thus far

My douyin makeup!

I think this was douyin inspired. 

🤭

and it was by accident too. I did not intentionally planned to put on my make up that day and thought, 'hmm I wanna do douyin today'. It just came out that way.

A happy mistake.

😋

If I remember correctly, I started playing and putting on full on makeup on my face back in 2016. So that would mean I have been 'practicing' for 8 years.

Masa awal-awal, I made an effort to put on make up every Saturdays or Sundays. Then, went out to take pictures 'in the wild'.

BUT it had been a while since I last did that. 

Especially when 2020 happened.

After that, I only wore make-up occasionally and when aku rajin.

My most recurring issue when ber-makeup is patchy base; 

1. foundation not matching my skintones lah 

2. cracks around my nose/nose bridge 

3. under eye not properly sets / dark undereye showing thru.

and since I only wore makeup when I feel like it, I forgot about my previous issues and either ended up with perfect make up for the day or made the same mistake again. 

There was no in between.

Kira macam, either I get lucky today or not. 

😆

giteww..

as of 2026, I reminded myself to always put on proper skincare before putting on make up. 

and then give the skincare a few more minutes to set.

AND THEN we can start laying my foundation.

"reminded" is the keyword.

I'm a little bit of a forgetful person nowadays. 😬

Anyways, that is all for today on the progress of my make-up journey thus far.

Below are two other looks that I accidently created and so happy I managed to take photos of.

October is here

hi lovely people!

if you think that this post was made in a rush, it was.

LOL.

I was being lazy and I thought, lets do another scrapbook style theme. since aku banyak paper lawa. I'm not saying doing scrapbook style is lazy, I'm just saying I am lazy.

Here it is:

I didn't even manage to do my Data Tracker yet. LOL literally done these two last night.

I tried to video my progress but I stopped half way coz my camera batt died, and ended up just finishing the deco without filming. Maybe I'll just continue filming my Data Tracker.

Sebenarnya, I wanted to do different theme, yg macam potion2. since, for some reason, October ani kana associate with witches. 

Example:

Pretty kan?

I should have pursue them but I was lazy and still am lazy. I just want an easy way out.

TAPI

seeing as this book / journal I am using is almost finish, maybe I'll redo the theme in the new one. maybe. no pressure tho.

😬

into the final quarter of 2020, how are we feeling thus far?

. . .

2 weeks of sad, and my July Bujo Theme

Hi.

First of all, I am tired.

Second of all, there's nothing I can do about it.

Which then leads me to being super upset. I couldn't even push myself to do anything else but willow in self pity. I couldn't open my journal to write down my feelings. I didn't even start my Bujo July Theme until 15th July! Imagine!

So, here's what's that look like:

I forgot who's July Theme inspired me to do mine but it wasn't AmandaRachLee. hmmm..let me just *check my History on youtube* Ok, it was from annika's leaf.

It was simple and I thought I could use a change; from drawing/coloring myself to using craft papers.

which I happened to have a lot of. 

(these two are the only one I have at the moment)

After I finished that I thought I'd be happy or temporarily so but I wasn't. 

My heart was still heavy and my eyes burned. 

to simply put, I am not happy. Not at all. Yeah I laugh out loud but only becoz I can't be upset in front of people. 

No one cares. 

No one listens.

It's not their problem.

It's mine.

and I'm ashamed to admit but my brain, it went dark. it still is. 

I'm aware of it going dark. I remind myself to not be. but it continues. 

I know people's gonna say "You're overreacting" "You're being dramatic" "it's all in your head" and I'm telling you, I am aware. I'm aware that maybe I am overreacting. Maybe I am being dramatic. Yes, it's all in my head. 

but explain this:

I was listening to EXO -  Power, the supposedly uplifting song in Kpop and one of my favorite song as well but why the hell was I thinking about is jumping of a bridge?

tell me what was that all about?

I imagine a better future, I can see them but at the same time, I'm not going anywhere. I'm stuck here. in this body. in this shell of a body. and I am not happy.

I. am. not. happy.

I. am. not.

Tell me where I can find help.

. . .

Posting Story again

I posted on AFF again.

a oneshot story.

I'm nervous but I am also relief that I finally did it.

Thanks to Aziz for the brief pep talk.

v(=∩_∩=)ﾌ

before I posted it, I was worried about how many people will bother to read it? ಥ_ಥ

Then after I posted it, seeing people actually bother to view the 'foreword' section, I was thankful. At least people are aware that the story exist.

I'd be lying if I said I was not down knowing people saw the existent of the story but not reading the actual story.
I was down.
but I said to myself; if I continued to post on blogspot knowing I don't have that many readers, posting on AFF is no different.

the only difference is; 
here on blogspot, its all real (albeit covered), 
on AFF, its entirely fiction (sorta :P)

You see, people like me, need to just get on with it. Just Do It. 
coz if we don't, we will end up procrastinating. forever. and we know procrastinating is not a progress.
at least, me posting that story is a step forward for me.
Small steps but still moving forward.

So, Yay me! for finally posting a story up on there.

Currently preparing the next story to post. I've been working on it for months. I just feel like I need to continue looking for that 'it' factor before finally posting them.

I am trying to write something out of my comfort zone. You know, challenging myself.

Hopes I pull thru.

Pray for me.

xD

. . .

Lindsay Lohan

this is a scheduled post.
(as many of my posts have been muahahah)

. . .

So, I was just watching an interview video of Lindsay Lohan from facebook and it was really interesting.




the topic that she was talking/discussed about is another matter

but what was interesting to me is the way she conveyed them.

The way she chooses her words and how very collected or knowledgeable of her to be able to convey what she wanted to say.

the way she acknowledged her past and refuses to talk more or dwell on it, shows how grown she has become.

I'm a fan of her work (and I don't really follow her 'dark' period) and seeing her in that interview makes me proud of her.
Not that I know her on a personal level, but because - womenhood. 
I think I'm in that phase of trying to find myself and what I like doing. Seeing that Ms. Lohan here is half-way there finding herself makes me feel that I have a chance too. 
I mean, her hardship was highly publicized! if she can raise up from that, why can't I?

She's another one of my inspiration today.

Here's another interview with Ellen.



a/n: some may say that she maybe faking this and is scripted. well, what do you know about hardship/mentallydepressed/onyourown ?

. . .

I am so paning right now

It's been ages since I last seen my hotmail via laptop/website.

and today, because of some emailing issue, I ended up using the website version of hotmail using my laptop. 

boy was I surprised and confused.

I'm not some IT savvy person and anything i did manage to do on the internet are mostly basic. I  mean, REALLY fcking basic. (eg, this blog design. I used Templates!)

So, when hotmail kept asking me to send a 'security code' to 'purple.and.lime@hotmail.com' mail, I was like, "Oh, 'purple and lime' ani sample email kali".
It's not.
it hits me, after several tries, that I OWNED purple.and.lime@hotmail.com!
I don't remember why I made it. probably out of 'sakai-ness'. you know, since at that time, making a hotmail account is so darn easy. maybe. I don't know. seriously, I have no idea!
and then when I tried to change it, came out another email address that reads 'pu****@hotmail.com' (Yes, cematu kana buat.. I don't know kana censored kh apa kh.. I know, what the hell right?)
I'm so confused!
why on earth did I make this weird hotmail accounts?!

but luckily, after a few more headaches figuring out this 'Outlook', I managed to get thru all the securities and updated it. Once that's done, I decided to clean my inbox.

clearly i didn't 'clean' much using my phone (coz usually, I open my mail and delete everything).

and along the way, I unsubscribe to this hmv newsletter (again, wtf face). When? How? Why?

I unsubscribe to any update from my youtube account too.

and here's the bizarre one; Twitter account.

i was on my way to disable my email notification when it asked me to log in and when I did, a message came out saying 'there is a suspicious activity going on' and it asked for some security questions.
then aku realized yg the display pic wasn't mine and I was hit the second time.
I've changed (via my phone) my username from Vengeance to AjeerahAwang a while back.
the funny thing is, why it let me thru in the beginning when I keyed in Vengeance with my current password?
I refreshed the page and keyed in the correct account name and password and everything went back to normal. Lucky we didn't panic - Ronald Weasley, Philosopher's Stone.

this whole thing is such a nerve wrecking experience! 
I know, I know. to some, this might be something of small matter. 
but for me, it is such a big matter.
maybe because, I still love my hotmail ID. it's childish, yes, but it holds a lot of memories that are sooooo me, made by me, for me. 
I don't know how else to explain it but I wish to hold on to something that is me 10-15 years ago coz it feels like I'm losing me these days.

. . .

ENOUGH WITH SOPPY THINGS!

on a brighter note, Pottermore Sorting is back!!
and I'm still a proud Badger!



Hufflepuff - Where They Are Just and Loyal!

I will try and tell you all about it some other time.

I know I still owe you guys the story behind my DIY phonecase too.

xD

until next time!

. . .

a/n: I'm supposed to be asleep like 4 hours ago.